Some call me Susan Boyle (because of my amazing singing), to others I'm Angelina Jolie (because of my obvious beauty) and to the rest of the world I'm Oprah (because I'm inexplicably wealthy, smart and good at everything I do).
BUT! To you, my avid readers, today you may call me Julia Child.
I'm guessing a few of you are staring at your computer in disbelief. This strange, little white girl from Charlotte, North Carolina could NEVER be compared to the Rachael Ray, Gordon Ramesey and much less Julia Child.
To those (few) skeptics I say... off with your head! Or... off with mine... as this post will probably embarrass me but, also allow me to take my place among the greats. For they too, were doubted by onlookers.
Today, I was hungry. I have little food. Mostly because I don't really know what to go to the grocery store to buy. So, I survive off sandwiches, pasta, cereal and other prepackaged delights. I was tired of all of that. My heart craved in n' out. But, my wallet put it's foot down and said "NO." So, I set off to take inventory.
I looked in my fridge. Most everything was getting close to empty. BUT! I had a dozen eggs. And what is better than eggs? Well, a lot. Anyway, I thought to myself... where's that "The Joy of Cooking" cookbook I have tucked away.
Luckily it was on my shelf of books. Tragically... cooking has never been a joy.
I found the section that said eggs. Now eggs for lunch was a foreign concept to me. Unless you cook them in top ramen. Which I have none of. It's too unhealthy. Right?
However, I stumbled across a recipe titled: Eggs in Poached Soup.
Poached soup? I read it wrong the first time. But, fortunately in a desire to discover what exactly poached soup was... I looked at the ingredients.
That's when everything changed. It called for eggs and tomato soup. Both ingredients I had. I was sold. Except for the poached part.
Eggs Poached in Soup:
"The following recipe makes a good, attractive, light meal - Prepared in a few minutes. Combine in a 8-inch skillet and heat to the boiling point over low heat:
- 1 Can of tomato soup: 10 1/2 oz.
Diluted with:
Add:
- 1/2 tsp of dried basil
- 1/4 tsp sugar
Reduce the heat and keep the liquid below the boiling point. Add to the soup:
Simmer 4 to 5 minutes or until the eggs firm up. Serve the eggs on...
Covered with the soup. Sprinkle them with
Easy enough right?
Well, I had the skillet already on the stove. I was heating it to start with my eggs. I was planning on scrambling them.. Well, I thought to myself... I'm pretty sure that's a skillet? I thought it was a frying pan, but I think they are about the same thing. So, I took out my trusty iphone and googled skillet. Sure enough what I had heating up on the stove was in fact a skillet.
I got my can opened. And I took out 2 eggs. I began pouring my soup onto the skillet. Well, the stove was on and the pan was hot (not medium heat) and the soup began to steam and burn and scream and all kinds of stuff. Freaking out, I abandoned the recipe. I quickly poured in my 1/2 cup of water, turned the stove off and moved my skillet to another burner.
I turned that burner to medium heat and began stirring frantically in an attempt to combine the soup and the water to one consistency. It worked! And then I remembered the sugar. I couldn't find any small measuring spoons... so I did a pinch. I figured in a recipe like this less is best. So, I didn't use a lot.
It suddenly dawned on me I had NO basil. Garlic salt is a good alternative right? I put a little dash of that... it quickly solidified. So, then I spent the next couple of minutes trying to chop little pieces of it up and make it dissolve!
Once all the excitement was over and the soup was "one" and it was finally boiling, I cracked my egg. Well, not one for poached eggs and being an expert at adding eggs to ramen, I used the same principle. I left the soup slightly boiling and added my egg all while stirring to make sure that the yolk did not solidify and that the egg cooked (like it looks in egg drop soup). It worked. And I decided that one egg was in fact, enough. I put the other egg away. Took my soup off the stove. And poured it into a bowl.
I almost forgot the most traumatic part of the story. Haha the whole story is traumatic right? Well, burned nasty chunks that looked a little like chunks of blood... were tainting my soup. So, I spent time scooping those out. It was an experience. And I was on the verge of nausea the whole time.
Wallah. I was done.
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| My beautiful lunch. Water, salt, crackers and soup. My communications book is underneath my joy of cooking. | Studious as always. |
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| I was unable to remove all the chunks and was forced to eat around them. |
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| The Recipe of life. |
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| Soon to be my new favorite book. |
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| My artsy picture. Cheese for some more taste. And also... to make it look more appetizing. |
The soup seemed to be evaporating as it cooled off. A most peculiar thing... As every time I looked over at it (I was doing the dishes while my piping hot soup cooled off) it was getting lower in the bowl. I came up with 3 explanations:
- It was evaporating.
- The ancient Greek gods must've thought it looked appetizing and thought I was offering burnt sacrifice. (My comparative literature class must be getting to me).
- My hunger was causing me to hallucinate.
Anyway, it wasn't so bad. It wasn't delicious. But, it was good. It was college food. It was well worth the calories... maybe not.
But, it was lunch. And for the day... I AM JULIA CHILD! So, address me as such.
Dear Mom,
You were right. I need to learn to cook. And you are far superior than I. I also need to eat more meat. So maybe, I'll call you soon and we can work out a grocery list. You're the best.
Love,
Sophie
The only thing missing was my cooking partner... Nikole. Everything goes better and tastes better with her around!
That is all.
Sincerely,
Julia Child.
