Love...

I've been doing a lot of "self discovery" these past few months. I know I haven't posted in awhile and it's not that I haven't had anything to post. Because, I have been so very blessed. My father found a job. My mother had her cancer removed and has begun radiation. My brother, cousin and I are all moved into our new apartments (and it looks BEAUTIFUL might I add). My younger brother is loving college. And my youngest brother is doing well in school. That only barely skims the surface. I have much to be thankful for. 

This, however, is a deeper personal reflection. And just like most everything else in my life lately, it has to do with Ecuador. I am sure everyone who lives close enough to hear my talk is sick of Ecuador. But, I am not. I miss what I had there. I miss those kids. I miss having purpose. I miss that unconditional love and the way a baby feels in your arms. I miss speaking spanish (however elementary my vocabulary was). I miss those two months more than I miss any other period of my life. 

“You’ve got to find what you love. And that is as true for your work as it is for your lovers. Your work is going to fill a large part of your life, and the only way to be truly satisfied is to do what you believe is great work. And the only way to do great work is to love what you do. If you haven’t found it yet, keep looking. Don’t settle. As with all matters of the heart, you’ll know when you find it. And, like any great relationship, it just gets better and better as the years roll on. So keep looking until you find it. Don’t settle.” -Steve Jobs

I am going to be a teacher. I love kids. I love teaching. I love that purpose that comes with waking up each morning and knowing that you might not be changing a life, but that you are impacting one. 

President Monson has said about teaching: 

"To you... who are administrators and teaches, you will stand before those who have struggled and saved and planned so that they might be your students. Treat them with dignity and provide them your very best. You not only teach a subject; you also mold human nature. You light the lamp of learning, that through your spirit,  your  faith,  and your love,  will bless generations yet to be born.  Your opportunities are NOT dissimilar to the Master Teacher, even Jesus Christ, the Son of God."

"Who is the teacher you remember from your youth? I would guess that in all probability it was the one who knew your name, who welcomed you to class, who was interested in you as a person, and who truly cared."

"The mark of a master teacher is indelible. It makes no difference whether or not he is teaching literature or mathematics or science or any other subject of the curriculum. He must win from his students faith that moves mountains. When he succeeds, near-mireacles happen. Suddenly a pupil is awakened to an enthusiastic interest in some aspect of learning and begins to read widely without being urged. Another discovers in himself powers that he did not know he had. Another decides to seek better companions. In a flash of inspiration, still another makes a decision that leads to a lifetime career."

After being in Ecuador I have a greater desire to serve and to help those that need it. I recognize how blessed I am and how ungratefully I have lived the past 20 years of my life. There are so many worldwide and even those in the United States that live so far below what I have always known as "normal." How ignorantly I lived until I saw. 

I know it is not my call in life to live in Ecuador and take care of those kids forever, as much as I wish that it was. There is more that I will be led to achieve and I can only pray it is as noble of a cause as taking care of those precious and perfect children. 

I hope that the remaining years I have at BYU I will be able to learn how to become the best teacher. I hope that through practice in the classroom I will one day be able to make an impact on student's lives. For it is so often that we forget our divine identity. We are not merely humans/people left to wander in confusion. I know I am a child of God. I know His hand is far more prevalent in my life than I ever had realized. And I know that there is no greater call than that of a teacher, mother, sister or friend. 

As I sat in Sunday School on Sunday, I found myself doodling on the notebook I bring to church. By the time I was finished I had come up with my own "quote." It read:

"Every person, no matter their age, race, religion, education, nationality or  social status IS a Child of God. Treat them like it. And remember you are NO different."

Those children in Ecuador changed my life and my mindset. I know it probably sounds silly, but I owe so much of what I am becoming to their sweet smiles, kindness and unconditional love. 

(I actually want to become fluent in Spanish and work at a Title II school. It's a new dream of mine. I love my brown babies. :)   ).